State of being intimidated...

It is really hard when someone is intimidated with you, just relax! This is who I am. I make no pretensions and just doing my job! 

- biatch 😏

The Art of Disconnecting ...

 If you can attach, you can detach👍

La Fin

Visited my blog for the longest time. Everything makes me laugh. I guess it was all crap! While reading my old post, the background I am hearing from my television is " The Last Time (2005) by Eric Benet" . This sums up everything 😄 "The End". 

"We accept the love we think we deserve"

I think this is quite true. I thought I have found the "right one" hehehe , but as everyday goes by, I learned the real you. It is so weird that I was not able to discover who you really are and I wonder why until now, you are like a stranger that I have known from the very start. I tried to dig deep through your heart and somehow to know you better. Sad to say, I did not prevail. So I divert myself on things I have ever wanted ,travelled to places I have never been just to escape the loneliness and sadness I am feeling  everyday. And so this strategy still didn't help me. Hopeless romantic isn't it. Oh well, maybe that's what life has to offer me. But then again, the best way is to go back to where my heart is -- Home! 

Bogus

Some people are Real.
Some people are Good.
Some people are Fake.
Some people are "Real Good at being Fake".

A fake, sham, phony, bogus, etc.  viral all over the globe! Selling like hot potatoes. Buy one take one. What a shame!

And then again "The world is full of lies and deception, be careful to whom you give your heart to".  And so the beast lure me again into a situation where I became weak as always, but thanks to myself, I've discovered how that person didn't change at all, still the same confused bitch who doesn't seem to understand the meaning of life. I thought you've changed for the better but it seems the underground beast was really a bitch after all. I gathered all my thoughts,and finally made a decision that I will never regret -- that is never to deal with such a disgusting person, you never fail to disappoint me after all . It was all lies from the very start. You were never worthy of my time!

The world is full of lies and deception, be careful to whom you give your heart to.

priceless time

This caught my attention and i love it!

killing me softly

Emptiness is what I have been dealing with all this time and I don't know when will this end. I wish somehow someone would fill up my loneliness and emptiness but for now all I have to do is continue breathing and experience life unfairness, uncertainty and whatever you call it. For now, my everyday sucks!

bewildered soul

I'm lost ...

Welcome the Year of the Ox

Last year was full of surprises and blessings for me…Got a job that deals with multicultural people…learned a lot on how to deal with frustrations and how to have a whole lot of patience . Well what to do but to live what life has to offer.

Surprisingly, I never expected to finally meet the love of my life, face to face but for a short term only. A month full of love, drama, and adventures. Although for a short time only, I have discovered the undiscovered and never seen and felt the unimaginable. A love affair I wish never have to end, however, I was fortunate enough that chance was given to us to celebrate the most important part of our lives – the word called Love.

Amazing part was both of us traveling, enjoying each others company. Discovering places I have never been, from North to South. Never thought and felt so much pleasure sharing funny moments. Just looking at those pictures makes me miss you more each day. Definitely one of the best adventures I’ve ever had spending with the one I love. Funny moments at our overnight stay at a certain place called Cordillera Inn, my first time to stay in a place I thought was fascinating. On the lighter side, although it was a horrible journey, it was my most unforgettable moment spending with my sweetie. Going far South, so much excitement and astonishment to the beauty of nature. Relaxing moments at Villa Escudero, absolutely a place I would recommend for people who knows how to appreciate nature.

The sad part was for us to part ways, don’t know when will be the next time for me to feel that kind of love again. It was a good year for me and for the Year of the Ox hopefully have continuous blessings. Time to rest now, got a flu due to extreme coldness.

"When possible make the decisions now, even if action is in the future.
A reviewed decision usually is better than one reached at the last moment."
--William B. Given Jr.

Underground Beast

Revealing my thoughts and emotions in this blog helps me release unwanted revulsion by whoever human beings I encounter in my everyday life. At work, I deal a lot of hypocrites and experience prejudice. I somehow learned some shocking and revealing misbehaviors of my so called "wave allies". Then again I saw something that really disgust me, a sequel of my ... You thought I wouldn't know. Imagine your arteries, vein and capillaries bursting with wrath! This time it is way over the line my friend and it really disgust me reading that short conversations with a person whom you met in certain dating sites. Stupid! you didn't destroy it in your sent items folder but you obliterated it in your inbox folder. You're one insensitive creature but one thing I can assure you of is I never did these things to you and I am totally devastated this time, very disappointed and I feel betrayed of someone I almost gave my life to. Maybe this is the reward of what I've done in the past ....don't want to waste my time anymore. It's a good thing I have options now unlike before. Now if you'll convince me that this is nothing...that's GARBAGE!

Surreptitious Blaze

You thought I wouldn't know...although it didn't pushed through I had my intuitions right before..the first time I saw that portrait, it struck me and ask myself what's that image doing in your secluded sanctuary. It's about 9 am and still I cannot find peace and serenity, I don't know why this thought suddenly popped out of my mind and perhaps became the object of my attention. I carefully piled up these series of events and finally came to one conclusion, that is --
That is one thing I hate most, admitting something that transpired a century ago. It's a good thing I was able to figure out things on my own way unintentionally. Being cautious in everything we do will divert us from these tempting situations. Aware or not one must be brave enough to reveal what is not to be revealed.

virtual love

As I watch you sleep, I see myself helpless and wondering why I still manage to persevere despite the feeling of yearning.
As I watch you sleep, I sympathize you for letting yourself be the servant of others. Watching you exhausted and feel sick makes my heart devastated and wanting to cuddle you tight to ease somehow that restlessness and anxiety.
I want you to take care of your health because someday I would like to feel and enjoy the whole you, feeling your warmth embrace and gentle kisses.

It is true that in this world we live in everyone needs to survive but we must also be aware of the reason for our existence -- that is to experience happiness, love, and pain, etc. So the best thing we could do right now is to say "I love you." to people who cares and are close to our hearts. There's a saying that " we never regret our lives the things that we do, only the things that we don't "...
Happy Hearts Day everyone...

My precious Calla Lily (hahaha!) you are truly unique in your own ways and for that you remain to be the champion in my heart!

Thank you God for giving me another chance to discover and explore the world, another opportunity to be reunited with my fellow homosapien sapiens and hopefully being freed from the comfort zone I've been with through the past years. Taking risk and facing this stressful havoc world is one difficult trip one must surpass.

"Life indeed is a journey and arduous quest after Truth."

Insanity of silence...

Before I go for my slumber, I wonder why some people do the craziest and silly things that for a brief moment someone was there to give a hand when no one was around and all you can hear is the insanity of silence and feel the cold breeze embracing my fragile body. Funny isn't it? How would you feel if that chance was given to you? Will you ignore it and just let the night elapse thinking it will die into silence? Will that moment be a mistake you'll regret for the rest of your life or pretend that it's just a normal thing? Frankly speaking I too don't know the answer, so before making abrupt decisions think twice, thrice or a million times. Who knows maybe you're one of them... I can't blame you! Only humans beings were given the ability to do such foolish actions. It's done and there's no turning back! all you need to do is face reality and smile for that moment was an experience you'll never forget..never to be revealed and forever sealed in your thoughts.

Keychain

I got this entry from a dear friend...
http://dverythotofu.blogspot.com/2007/11/key-to-you.html


Key To You


of all the keychains in this world,
u gotta be
one of the finest.
unique. neat.
and classic.

ud surely put the other keychains to shame for
ur chain of a heart is so well-made that
the refuge it offers to desperate keys give
inexplicable happiness,
both to ur own holder and the keys themselves.
which rarely happens.

u carry urself so wonderfully that
the number of keys connected to u
do not matter.
it shud have been heavy and burdensome to others of ur kind but
u can balance them all without bein unfair.
ur honorable, righteous, honest.
u speak ur mind when necessary which
greatly inspires these keys to stay close to u.
for theyd understand that,
as harsh as ur words may sometimes be,
theyd understand, they were in very good "hands".
if they're ever wrong bout somethin,
ud be the very first one to tell them so.
with firmness and yet,
with tenderness and utmost compassion.

ur an adventurer.
u aspire to go to various places and
share the experience with everyone with
such enthusiasm that the keys cudnt help but feel honored,
for they feel like theyr also travellin
with the very kindhearted you.

bein with u makes everythin so cheerful.
the sounds brought by the janglin of keys all round ur chain
give color to the world
normally viewed as
dull, unexcitin, boring.

one thing that these keys do not know tho is,
u r a puzzle.
just when they thot they knew u already,
the truth of the matter is,
they dont.

u may be tough and strong
on the outside but inside,
ur longin for this special key
that wud open this
house of a soul
that u have.

a key that wud be there to unlock the intense emotions
bottled so thoroughly up deep within.
a special key that wud be a perfect fit
for an extra special keychain as urself.

dont lose hope.
for every keychain,
there's always a correspondin key that wud be with it
forever.

that special key still
exists.

all u need to do is,
wait. and.
have faith.

i dedicate this to one of the greatest friends iv been blessed to have.
u know who u are.
thank you bein includin me as one of the keys in ur keyholder.
ur one keychain i treasure so!
thanks for stickin thru,
my gratitude is endless.
labshu friend!

pathetic bomb.....

For some time now I have observed that some people are such "pathetic bomb" or should I say "pathetic losers"...why do I say that??? I just don't get it! If they are just playing dumb, dumber or numb or whatever you call it. Where are there neurons???Deteriorating??? Or worst, flushed out in the toilet harharhar. Why are some people unable to accept reality? why can't they just be contented of what they have right now instead of disturbing peoples lives...in short why don't they just get lost! lols. It makes me annoyed of such strange character that during the time of their relationship they should have done all the things that have made their relationship work! So why then after how many years they just show up trying to rekindle their past...are they dumb or what???What do they think of us??? An operated machine? That in a single push on button things will work just what they wanted it to be? That’s so ridiculous!...do you they think money can buy everything? Even ones' dignity or ones' soul? Do they think reminiscing their good times will bring their relationship back? That’s so pathetic!!! Guess what!!! As I was writing this blog two of these "pathetic bomb" suddenly popped out of no where and had conversation with me lolz...oh well I got one thing to say - - I just pity them... I just smiled and said to myself that I am happy and contented with whom I am with right now - - I am living a simple life without having any guilt in my conscience, I have my sapphos whom I dearly love...I may not have that extravagant lifestyle but I am proud to say that I am a genuine person with a simple ideology -- to brighten up people and to touch their hearts in my own special ways. Keep on dreaming because good things happen to people who are pure in heart.

questions unanswered...

finally i finished editing settings and templates on this account...so much thoughts in my mind right now...don't know what to do...don't wanna worry anymore "sigh" ...why does it have to happen to me???i thought everything will turn out fine but i was wrong... i feel so miserable...when will it be right time for me??? so much questions unanswered...time is running out...time to get back on what i've started before...my enthusiasm and determination to do it right this time...focus on what you want to become alright!!!

hilarious....

Oh my goodness! It's been ages since I last visited my blog and what the hell was I thinking of during those times (lol). I find my past post to be hilarious and dramatic harharhar. Hmmm what was i doin from july of 2006 to march 2007??? gosh it's been a year I haven't been here! I guess I was buzy during those times (lol), buzy with what???can't remember..I think I have a memory gap (lol). Can't believe what I've gone through during those months...lot of happenings I haven't written here, some are sad while some are fun. Oh well, time passed by and guess what.. I got somebody new in my life, my inspiration, my newly found love, my one and only - - Sapphos. What can i say? I found my love at the right time and at the right place, must be destiny? whatever you describe it...the important thing is we found each other. Got lot of changes in settings to do here, maybe i'll do that some other time, anyways it feels good to write again here specially that i'm inspired with thoughts of my sapphos who has been part of my everyday. I love you hun wherever you are whatever you do, you'll always be in my heart! As i write this, she's actually snoring right now (lol). Till the next post ...ciao!!!

"Every thought of you makes me feel I'm so much inlove with you."